Thankfully, most Grandboomers enjoy a loving and healthy relationship with their grandchildren. They are welcome visitors and communicate frequently via the Internet, phone and mail. You spend time with your grandchildren...take them on trips...and it benefits both of you. Many of you provide daycare or are even raising your grandchild.
On the other side of the coin, some grandparents aren't permitted see or interact with their grandchildren because the children's parents or legal guardians refuse them permission. Maybe there is ill will between you and the child's parents. Or, they are divorced or a parent has died and the parent with custody does not want you to have the right to visit. You may be surprised to find out that laws that determine a grandparent's visitation rights vary from state to state.
If you are being refused the opportunity to interact with your grandchild(ren), and you want to take action to be permitted to do so, your first step is to learn about the visitation law in the state where your grandchild lives. No state law automatically permits you the right to visit your grandchild. You may need to retain an attorney and go to court to ask for visitation rights.
At one time, all 50 states permitted grandparents the right to ask the court to consider their request to visit their grandchildren. This is no longer true. Many states invalidated grandparent visitation laws mandating that they violate the rights of the parents. If your grandchild lives in one of those states, you have to work out the situation with the parent or guardian.
Other state courts have upheld visitation laws. In those states, Grandboomers will have to prove they should be able to visit their grandchildren. If you appeal in one of these states, the court will act in the best interest of the child.
Legal counsel can tell you whether grandparent visitation laws in the state where your grandchild lives have been upheld or have been made invalid by the courts.
Going to court is an emotional experience and can also be expensive. Before taking that step, see if there is a more amicable solution to the situation:
* If your grandchild's parents are getting a divorce ask them to set up a visiting schedule for you as part of their divorce agreement. This will help you avoid problems in the future.
* If you have a poor relationship with your grandchild's parents try to understand what is causing the problem and, for the benefit of the grandchild(ren) try to work out a solution that fits both your needs.
* Before taking legal action, consider use of a mediator. The mediator will listen to the arguments, concerns and pleas of both sides and using professional counsel, help you work out a solution.
* If you don't have visitation rights, continue to reach out to your grandchild. Remember birthdays and holidays with cards and gifts. Call and email. This may be painful if there is no response, but there is another reason to make the effort. Keep a record of your attempts to contact the child. If you do have to go to court, you can provide the judge with proof that you want to see the grandchild.
* If you have to go to court, seek an attorney with experience in family law and one who knows the grandparent visitation rights in the state where you will be filing your suit.
One last point, remember that the purpose of your efforts is to have a good relationship with your grandchild(ren). It serves no good purpose to say anything detrimental about the parents to young ones.
© 2012 Created by Myles Bristowe.
